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My Goal Review (Q4 2015 + Recap)

“You’ll get everything you want out of life, if you can stay focused – it’ll just take longer than you expected.” – 2015

 

Life is funny.

One day you feel like you’re on top of the world and the god-given gift to mankind whilst you effortlessly plow through work, blow away women with your magical social skills and throw weights around in the gym like it’s nothing.

Yet some days you can hardly drag yourself out of bed to face the coming day, knowing it will probably disappoint you before it has even begun. You know? The ones that make you feel like the most incompetent retard this planet has ever brought forth.

Another 3 months have past and we’ve reached the end of 2015 – Time for a good ‘ol review I say.

Yup.

Why? – you may ask.

By making these quarterly reviews I’m able to clearly measure the progress I’ve been making and accurately lay out what I need to do next in my life. In the end it also gives a cool overview of my life and allows other people to learn from my mistakes or advice me on where I can improve (please do).

Quick note: Glad you’re still with me after a looooong blogging break (*gives virtual high-five*). You get +5  friendship points. These can be traded-in for free hugs whenever you meet me in real life :).

The main areas I’ve been focusing on this quarter were my wealth (web developing mainly) & social goals (mainly improving comfort with women & doing more events/meet-ups).

You (should) know the drill by now;

My Previous Reports;

Fancy Color code;

  • Achieved
  • Failed
  • Discontinued

Click any picture to enlarge.

héhé

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MIND

I’ll easily meditate 20 mins each day  (15)
I’m still noticing solid benefits from “emptying my mind” every morning and therefore haven’t stopped it – but I have reduced it to 15 mins. Also, I’ve completely quit Holosync, as I didn’t find the effects that different when compared to a normal relaxation audio-tape. I’m waiting for my refund to re-invest into something different.

I’ll easily do a consistent MR at 6:30 and ER at 20:00
It’s impossible to do this 100% consistent, for the next quarter I’m going to aim for a specific percentage that I can calculate using my tracking sheet to make a more realistic goal. Here’s what it all currently looks like;

MR: Wake up @ 6:30 > Back exercises (injury) > Drink 750ml water > Cold shower, Brush teeth & get dressed > Audio visualization > Check priorities + gratefulness > Meditate 15mins + tea > Brain shake > Read 1 hour
ER: Brush teeth, floss & wash face @ 20:00 > Back exercises (injury) > Journal + plan next day

I’ll easily review my essential archive for 1:30 every Sunday
I have not been prioritizing this at all on my Sundays whilst it should be an actual important part of my life. By reviewing these questions regularly I’m able to remember essential information for the long-term. Will be focusing back on it again next quarter with some consequences attached to it.

I’ll easily get to dual 6 back
I haven’t noticed any significant/noticeable changes from doing this by remembering more names/events or increased creativity and therefore I’ve simply dropped it so I can spent my time on activities where I see more ROI. I’ve planned – however – to re-experiment with it in the future by doubling the amount of time I put into it. That’ll have to decide if it works or not (my rote/short-term memory is absolute shit. I have difficulty remembering things that seem unimportant/trivial. My brain just does not register names, events or past conversation topics)

BOOKS: Flow, 7 Habits, Rituals
This was actually the first time I’ve ever read flow by Mihaly C. (yeah, not typing that out) and I was actually surprised it was such a great book. It’s definitely recommended! Here’s some quotes that really stood out;

“The best moment usually occur when a persons’ body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile.” (when our skills are heavily challenged and we triumph, those are the times we enjoy the most)

 

“Chaos & entropy is the natural state of mind, when left to its own devices, with no demands on attention the disorder of consciousness reveals itself.

OVERALL

I’m happy about the consistency of my routines. They allow to start and end my day optimally and gives a nice sense of “control” in the morning and go to bed satisfied and relaxed.

I need to re-implement some old habits that have (partly) faded away like the archive review. I really like the fact I’ve improved the audio-visualization of my personal mission statement. It helps to reconnect myself with the person I aim to be and the behavior I tolerate of myself (code of conduct). It allows me to correct “wrong” behavior whenever I’m off-track.

Satisfaction in this area is a 6.5/10


HEALTH

I’ll easily eat a hypercaloric, paleo diet at least 5days/week
Fat Simon coming up. Here’s what I eat in an average day;

I’ll easily be 85kg @ 13% BF
I’ve been changing quite a lot of things in my mealplan lately and have added some white rice again to my diet to increase in mass (since that’s actually my main focus in the health department). Currently I’m 83.2kg @ +-10% in the morning. Here’s a physique update (cold – before training);

I’ll easily have a 105cm chest size & 41,2LA + 42,7RA
I’ve really stopped caring about strength lately. I just want to get bigger and see progression that way. I guess my fitness goals will differentiate throughout the years from being more muscular, to being more lean, to being more agile, … . It keeps things fresh I guess.

I’ll easily have cured my back injury/anterior pelvic tilt (donald duck butt)
I haven’t been able to solve my lower back injury despite doing daily mobility and stretching exercises in the morning and evening. I’ve finally went to the physician since it gradually got worse (can’t bend back without pain) and she diagnosed that I have a right erector spinae that’s overdeveloped (too tight) in comparison to my deeper abdominal muscles (by hyperextending on the deadlift). She gave me exercises to strengthen my abdominals – I give it a month and otherwise I’m getting a second opinion. I don’t really trust the diagnose but will stick with it for at least 1 month.

I’ll easily do a HIIT run every saturday (5 min WU + 15 mins, 1 min intervals + 5 mins CD) (November start)
I’d like to do at least some cardio to maintain my conditioning and not just look good and feel good. I think going for a run (HIIT) will give me biggest benefits for the least amount of time.

BOOKS: Paleo Solution
Great book as it gave me more theoretical/scientific background for the paleolithic diet and why it’s the most common sense approach to nutrition to date. 

TEST: Modafinil (1W) , Liquid Fish Oil (H) , Stop picking nose (H), Mobility Stretches (H)
I’ve tried some experiments with liquid fish oil & mobility stretches (to fix my back) But cancelled them as I didn’t see any improvements after 2 months . The fish oil is staying as a habit. I still have my pack of (untouched) modafinil on my dorm room ready to be tested out (edit: tested it out today, didn’t notice much of a difference)

OVERALL

I still haven’t recovered from my back injury, which is my main concern in the health department. My physical therapist says it’ll take two months to recover from.  I bet (hope) it’s a temporary injury and not some permanent damage to my back. Otherwise that would suck major balls. I’m still able to train around it, but I just can’t do any squats or deadlifts as they put too much tension on my back.

For now I’ll focus on training three times a week and strengthening my abdominal muscles whilst daily stretching my back muscles.

It bothers me more than I care to admit. Especially after the time and energy I’ve invested into my health. I hate it when I have a problem in my life that’s not under my control but affects my life quality tremendously. It’s probably my biggest overall concern at the moment. My main focus for the next quarter in this area is getting it fixed by the exercises I’ve been giving and some extra back stretches.

I estimate satisfaction in this area @ a 5/10. Without the injury it would be (at least) an 8.


WEALTH

I’ll easily have completed and succeeded a business course in November
I’ve done a basic course on business knowledge like legal system, taxes, bookkeeping and all that to get my web-development company of the ground I’ll be starting next year. Was great and in-depth.

I”ll easily plan & pass the exam on business
For the certificate I still need a separate exam which is planned the 13th of January. After that I’m officially capable of running a business (on paper). I’m directly going to file for my first company when I get the certificate. (edit: passed)

I’ll easily have started SportsMeats up again and sold my first product
The initial idea of starting a post-order company for fresh meat is still in the back of my head and definitely a viable concept that could work with the right permissions. But over the past year I’ve realized how important it is to focus your time in the workplace on one, single thing. Divided attention rarely gets you anywhere. So therefore I’ve made my best guess based on the information I currently have; web-developing. I’ve made the decision and i’m sticking with this until someone pays me for it. Meanwhile I’m blocking out other possible options. It’s still an option I’m looking to pick up again in the future.

I’ll have coded at least 3 web application websites (Blogger platform, portfolio, email app)
I’ve been building some ruby on rails applications to improve my skills and display to potential employers the projects I’ve been working on. The blogger platform was basically the first ever app I made, using a tutorial. The portfolio and email app where just some more practice. I don’t think it’s necessary good stuff nor do I believe it should be. My first blog posts sucked balls too  I think whenever you’re learning a skill (inefficiently) you’re always going to have an initial “pain” period where everything you make simply fails miserably. But it’s something everyone needs to go through. Here’s what the portfolio currently looks like;

I’ll have coded my book archive and uploaded it as a searchable platform to my website.
Apparently this isn’t even possible as the server I’m hiring isn’t configured to run ruby on rails but needs php (a language I don’t know). I’ll probably going to rent one that can run rails apps in the future.

I’ll easily have created SimonSomlai.com where I sell my web-developing services + made a Facebook page
Haven’t made the time to work on this project – as others seemed more important. Getting more rails apps out primarily. I’m also going to use a company name to come across more professional. 

I’ll easily have completed the ODIN web-development 101 course (100%)
I’m at 70% at the moment and was doubting to cancel this goal but I’ve decided to finish for the sake of ending something I’ve started. Having a “How to” when learning a new skill is simply indispensable. Odin definitely made it a lot easier and having a clear trajectory laid out when learning something new is probably the best tactic to do so. It still was  a pain in the ass though.

I’ll easily be making at least 80€/week in a side-job
To cover my current expenses for food and whatnot I’ve dropped my sidejob in the trash collecting department (to inconsistent work schedule, underpaid, bad hours, long distance) for working at a carwash (consistent work, underpaid, good hours, close by). 

I’ll easily have written the first draft of my thesis and gotten the platform done
For my thesis I’m aiming to make a online video course based on the paleo-diet. It’s a good way to increase my skills in web-developing and finally finish my schooling. Which – by all standards – wasn’t nearly as profitable as the things I’ve learned in my spare-time. 

BOOKS: The New Way Things Work, HTML & CSS, JavaScript (schoolbook), The Ultimate Sales Machine

OVERALL

I’m still doubting if I’m focused enough in my goals of wealth. I’m trying to use the advice I’ve gotten from the book “One thing by Gary Keller ;

 In your personal life you’ll have to juggle everything but balance is a myth in the workplace. To achieve an extraordinary result, you must choose what matters most and give it all the time it demands. This requires getting extremely out of balance in relation to other work issues.

I sometimes feel like a complete and utter retard when programming and still frequently doubt if it’s something for me. But, based on all the information I’ve gathered so far, it’s the best choice I can make for my future. (I also don’t believe anymore programmers are necessary socially handicapped people – that’s all up to them). Next period I want to focus on just making a shitload of rails apps.

I feel like a lot of people are simply wasting so much valuable time trying to find that job/skill which feels just right. I don’t believe in passion. As a matter of fact, I’ll probably roll my eyes at you when you use the word in conversation with me. (among others; empower, purpose, inspire, passion, “the universe”, manifest)

I believe in reducing choice opportunities by selecting an industry to work in (my case; ict), selecting valuable skills that are in demand, difficult and based around your strengths. Then double down on them by breaking through the initial pain period where you’ll feel an incompetent retard until you are good enough.

Reinvest the money in investments that bring you passive income over time like stocks, bonds, high yield funds/exchange traded funds, houses, parking lots, carwashes, laundromats, tanning salons, atm’s, vending machines, billboards, advertisement space, rental objects, …

Until that revenue covers your basic expenses = freedom.

Satisfaction = 7/10


SOCIAL

I’ll easily have done at least 8 social meet-ups/events (writing, event, coding, new friends…)
I’ve actually done quite a lot of events and I’m happy with that – I probably put this goal higher than I really cared about. I think 5 events in a quarter is quite enough in total. I’ve been to a 
erotics event (it’s less impressive than you think – just a bunch of sexually frustrated men ogling rock-bottom self-esteem girls), virtual reality meetup (tried oculus rift!) , tedX event (The speakers weren’t that interesting, but pretty cool for the experience), Ruby Meetup (AWESOME! I’ve find some people that are following a similar career-path and might be able to mentor me a bit, Time to value-leech!) and a light-carousel thing/ carnival (going out is a waste of time really).

I’ll easily will be having a board-game/social hobby evening every week.
I think planning this in every week is a bit much since we’ll have to coordinate with at least two people to fit each others’ schedule but overall this has been fairly consistent. I’ve only missed 4 weekends. I think doing this every other week is a lot more realistic and would feel less “forced”. Still great fun :D

I’ll easily see/skype with Nicolas and Michael at least once every week.
In adolescence with shared interests and a lot of free time making friends is easy. But cultivating strong friendships is more difficult as we grow older. I’m afraid some of our paths might split in the future as we might take separate ways (less similarity) or move to other countries where we can barely see each other (reduced proximity). In the end I’ll have to accept I can’t really control those factors. The factors I can control are openness (sharing everything/talking about what matters) and engagement (putting in effort to actively meet up regularly). 

I’ll easily have had sex with one girl/Prostitute OR 3 kisses, 80 approaches
I’ve been focusing a lot more on getting better with women and have had significant better results than last quarter although I still have a long way to go. At the moment I do pick-up about 2days/week and approach about 5-10 girls/week. Compared to the hours I put into training/programming that is pretty negligible. I’m going to bump this up to 3days/week and 10-15 approaches. Also during “off-time” I want to be more aware of opportunities I’m missing.

I’ve had 84 approaches, dozens of deep conversations (didn’t track but I guess at least 9 conversations which lasted more than 30 minutes) , 4 dates, 3 girls kissed and 0.5 sex (hand-jobs don’t count as sex). I stopped tracking numbers and facebook as they are lousy indicators of the quality of interactions. Girls give fb and numbers to anyone who asks really. 

I’ve contemplated having sex with a prostitute and even went up there to ask for details like what’s allowed, what it cost, how much time you get and decided not to do so (I’m not against it though). I’m looking more for emotional intimacy then a mere physical release. I want something for the long-term. You can’t kiss a prostitute, only get 20 minutes with her and the sex probably isn’t that great anyway.

BOOKS: No More Mr Nice Guy, Crucial Conversations, How To Talk To Anyone
To keep my life balanced I try to read books from every single area of my life. I really liked the no-more mr nice guy one :) It helped me to realize some deep-seated emotional blocks in me. It helps to accept yourself more (even the sides you’re the most ashamed for) . Here’s some good quotes; 

“Intimacy implies vulnerability, letting others peer into the abyss of the inner self.

Once the sex begins in relationships, the learning stops. Sex created a powerful bond that obscures your ability to accurately evaluate the relationship

 

We live life with screwed up “emotional maps” we developed in childhood without ever questioning their validity.

OVERALL

I’ve noticed from reading no more mr nice guy I have a lot more emotional blocks than I thought with women. Here’s some realization that came from reading this book;

In my youth I’ve had a lot of painful rejections from girls (don’t know if I had more than others – but for me they were pretty painful. ) which led to a deep seated fear of being inadequate towards women and even shame for my personality (making me search for validation from them), a slight resentment towards women/seeing them as inferior, trying to isolate myself to avoid rejections and a peculiar attraction towards emotionally unstable/unconfident girls (easy to get approval from).

In my middle school throughout high school I’ve had a rebel-period with a lot of detention, punishments and verbal (even physical) assault from teachers. This lead to more isolation and an overall avoidance of people (A pattern I still resort to when others annoy me I’ve noticed) – leading to decreased social skills throughout high school and a good part of college.

The biggest part of my childhood I was raised by a single mother and female teachers. Lack of solid male role models (by an early divorce by my parents) in middle school & high-school didn’t help to solidify my vision on manhood. Disconnected from men, raised by women;

To escape/improve I used coping/defense mechanisms to make sense out of my reality.

  1. I played a lot of video games (to escape painful life & people. They gave me a feeling of importance, clarity, achievement/reward, variety of experiences, social approval based on skill level and not my personality which I saw as “flawed”.
  2. I escaped in weightlifting (externalizing masculinity as “being muscled’, wanted to be noticed/respected by others (especially women). Role models like Greg Plitt and Elliott Hulse made a lot of impact on me.
  3. Main coping mechanism was isolation (escaping from painful people; not asking for help, “I’ll do everything myself to prove how great I am”/”that I don’t need anyone”; not opening up emotionally to avoid getting hurt/being thought I’m weak because of my personality.

As we get older we get a deeper understanding of who we are and are able to correct our fucked up emotional patterns we carry around for no useful reason (another reason I hate my brain lol). But through a practice of self-acceptance, positive reference experiences, continuous exposure and implosion therapy (fancy word for visualization) I’ll eventually be able to deal with this. I’ve made incredible progress for my standards and I’m genuinely proud to be where I am now.

However, I believe it will take at least 1-2 years to get really good at something. Same thing for social skills and overcoming emotional blocks/social anxiety. But I’m willing to suffer through it though. In life nothing worthwhile just falls into your lap. If you want something – you go out to get it.

I still feel awkward or like a sociopath stalking the train station of my town (I even think the shop-owners think I’m some kind of pick-pocketer). I still mess up a lot and feel like a complete fuck up on a regular basis. But I guess that’s just part of it. Doing this will make sure I’ll have a time and place in the future where I’ll be comfortable around attractive women, less jealous/needy and overall a better person. Good quote from good looking loser;

I do feel, however, for quys in their 20s, it is both healthy and rewarding to dedicate a couple of years to first beating your anxiety («6 months) and then Getting Laid (12-18+ months).

 

After that, you’ll be more efficient and wont have to put In the time or effort to get some action when you want it.

I fully agree – It’ll just take some more investment by

  • Gradual experience and exposure therapy
  • Accepting failure as a learning experience
  • More references and consistent action

Although I’m not yet where I want to be in this area – I still have a lot more results compared to first half of ’15.

A last note on jealousy with close friends; Friends who have strengths you lack can be confronting and accentuate your weaknesses which will make you more resentful – if not addressed. Sometimes the successes of the ones closest to you will make you feel like a failure. Jealousy is a (useless) emotion – and just like negativity and fear it needs to be crushed by a rational mind.

Therefore;

  • Talk about it (not doing this leads to silent resentment)
  • Practicing gratitude/self-acceptance (measure yourself in things you’re proud about)
  • Use jealousy as an indicator to grow yourself. What are the opportunities to grow in this?
  • Accept some weaknesses will never become strengths. And be genuinely ok with that. You can improve it to become a lot better compared to the average population, just never “world class”.
  • Don’t underestimate the power of sleep on your negative self-talk. Get 8 hours.
  • Meditation to clear mind

Satisfaction= 6.5/10


ENERGY

I’ll easily do a crazy party on New Year
I haven’t really done anything crazy. I made food with a friend, we baked pancakes with nutella (wow) and watched Ted 2 (That movie is fucking hilarious) and afterwards watched some fireworks. I start to really dislike partying/going out. It’s definitely not my thing. I think this was better than any party we could’ve had.

I’ll easily go to a classical piano concert
I just tried this out to see if I would like it and for the variation. It’s something I could enjoy and was nice for the experience but not necessary something I would repeat.

I’ll easily go to a dress up halloween party & carve pumpkins
I didn’t do anything special for Halloween this year. I had a lot of priorities/projects that needed finishing around that period and therefore made the better decision not to follow through with this.

I’ll easily eat 3kg of candy in a day
God, I set some stupid goals – Still doing this in the future though :p 

I’ll easily have gone to an erotics convention
Lover of wobbly female appendages since ’94.


2015 RECAP + HIGHLIGHTS

Not every year will be able to top its predecessor – at one point you will have a regression to the means. I’ve seen a lot of red in this post – which is ultimately ok I guess. Realism in my goals comes with repeated life experience. I’m going to see it as an indicator of where I am, not what I am.  Overall I’m contented with this year although I expected to have achieved more at this point. I believe my estimates for the time It’d take to get really good with women and make money with my rails applications was inaccurate.

It’ll take at least another year of continuous practice to get great at this. Therefore the biggest lesson I learned in 2015 was;

“You’ll get everything you want out of life, if you can stay focused – it’ll just take longer than you expected.” – 2015

MIND

My mindset has grown stronger over this year by using my visualization audio-tape. I’ve also realized some deeper emotional blocks about my past which still need fixing.

I’ve been journaling my life for the full year and definitely implemented meditation in my morning routine. I’ve build up my OneNote archive to make/refine my “mental blueprints” to get what I want in each area of my life. This organized structure allows me to store and recall essential information whenever I need it.

I’ve improved my morning and evening routines to match my needs for the day and to make me ready to attack my goals or wind-down when I’ve come from a long day of work.

Through my improved list of “common problems” in my OneNote archive I’m able to quickly deal with problems I face regularly. My tracking sheet, journal, highlight archive, OneNote and planners allow me to have full control of my days and week which gives a great feeling of order and calmness in my head.

HEALTH

I’ve consistently kept my workout routine and added about 2 kg since the beginning of this year. I’m @ about 83.2kg and 11% body fat. I think I’m relatively close to reaching my natural potential after 5 years of training. I’d like to be able to end @ 85kg with 8% body fat next year and maintain that for the rest of my life. So I’m going to a good final bulk again after I’ve cured my injury.

I’ve also finally settled on a simple clothing style and haircut I like (definitely don’t underestimate the importance of this). Looking your best makes a difference in how you feel about yourself. If you dress your best at 6:30 when others walk around the house in pyjamas you feel like you’re “handling” life before others are even awake.

I’ve included a morning shake to boost my brain and tweeked my supplements.

I’ve also settled on a diet which seems optimal for my needs at the moment that’ll fuel me for the gains I want to make and the mental energy I’ll need.  I don’t really care if it requires me to eat the same stuff for days on end. You shouldn’t either. You should do the things that’ll bring you the results you’re looking for.

WEALTH

I’ve made huge progress on programming this year. I’ve learned HTML, CSS, JavaScript (+Jquery), Ruby, Rails and some basics on SQL (database) & Rspec (testing language).

Furthermore I finished my book called the life guide which has over 500 downloads atm. I’ve been able to grow this website to +-4000 weekly unique visitors and 650+ subscribers so far. I’ve gotten about 130k visitors this year and a quarter of a million views. I’ve gotten some great feedback on my blog and the book :)

I’ve almost finished my college education and approach my last six months in school (which I’m really grateful for) since I’ll finally be able to devote all my time to things that are actually useful.

I’ve still been tracking my expenses using my financial template every month.

SOCIAL

Another area in which I’ve made solid progress.

I’ve approached at least over 100 girls, kissed 7 new girls, had sex with 3 new girls and overall became more comfortable and grown my courage in talking to them yet realized I still have some emotional baggage from my past which I’ll have to overcome if I ever want to get completely comfortable around women. I’m even going to focus harder on this in the future to get what I want out of that area.

I’ve strengthened my friendship with Nicolas and Michael (and did the coolest/most memorable vacation of my life with them)

I’ve implemented a semi-consistent social hobby in my life which I really enjoy and helps me to relax around like-minded people.

I’ve also done a great amount of awesome events where I met new interesting people. I should however focus on reaching out to new people and actively creating new friendships next year.

ENERGY

Routine is vital for progress but it also makes your life boring as fuck. Find a more optimal way to spend your time by applying the 80/20 YOLO-rule

I’ve gone to a lot of events this year to simply engage more with life and introduce variety in my days. I’ve also made the best vacation I’ve had in my life to France with two close friends.

This was actually the highlight of my entire year – an experience never to be forgotten.


 Essence

It’s cool to be able to look back on my year like this and see the things I’ve accomplished (and selectively discard the things I failed). I’m overall satisfied with the way I’m living and feel like the choices I made are the best ones I can take with the information I have. To minimize regret by spending time in useful areas and continuously capturing the past.

You will get everything  you want out of life if you stick to the path you’re walking. No matter how slow you’re moving forward, how dysfunctional your web apps are or how completely retarded the things you say to a pretty girl are.

It’s still progress.

So readjust your estimates of how long it’ll take to get what you want out of life and start walking. It’ll take at least 3 years overall to be really great at anything worthwhile. Just start and don’t look back.

Here’s some last lessons I learned the last quarter;

  • We get the things we’re willing to suffer for. How do you choose to suffer? (Mark Manson)
  • It’s up to you to manage your life. You can have all the friends/help in the world but eventually it will be you to bring in the money, attract the girl and lift the bar. There’s no escaping that. No-one cares nor will ever care as much about your problems as you do.
  • Relations start to end when we remain quiet about things that matter.
  • The harder the job forces you to think logically, the harder it is to switch to having fun and loosening up.  That explains why heavy problem solvers and analytical thinkers are usually not comfortable in a social environments such as parties, bars and clubs: their emotional side of the brain is not as developed as their logical side or needs to be put into gear.
  • The challenges in life come 1 by 1. Just like only one grain of sand can pass through the hourglass at a time. Focus on being great, not for the rest of your life – just today.
  • The price must be paid and the process followed. You always reap what you sow; there is no shortcut. Grind is the solution – not passion.
  • Definition of power: Having something other people want/need
  • Think of the future as branching probability streams. What’s the most probable actions that will get you the result you’re looking for.
  • General opinion on health, money and relationships is mostly wrong and wrong opinions can be very costly. Consult experts & form own opinions by stress-testing them against reality.
  • Once the sex begins in relationships, the learning stops. Sex creates a powerful bond that obscures your ability to accurately evaluate the relationship. It’ll be harder (if not impossible) to objectively measure your compatibility. People settle all the times for partners that are bad matches for their personality.
  • Talking about your weaknesses/exposing them is the only way to overcome them and find self-acceptance. Sharing yourself this openly forces you to ‘own’ your weaknesses and finally accept them.
  • The weaknesses we see as unchangeable to our personality are the traits that bother us most.
  • Breakthroughs depend primarily on the resources of a single mind. Nothing truly revolutionary has even been invented by committee (Steve Wozniak)
  • Without concentration and continual investment of psychic energy, a complex activity breaks down; skills, job, family, relationships, friends.
  • Time is the great equalizer of life – In good or bad days, remember this; This too shall pass.
  • School is just memory training & occupational therapy unless you’re working towards a specialized occupation (lawyer, doctor, ..)
  • Chaos & entropy is the natural state of mind. When we’re left alone with no demands on attention the disorder reveals itself (by focusing on negativity).
  • Be at the forefront of human progress so that there are no words yet for what you’re doing
  • Make less promises
  • Success is in the system (mental map) you use – not in the people (own/other incompetence)
  • It’s easy to fool people into believing almost anything – shows the worth of an opinion/perception
  • Comfort comes from exposure – skills come from practice
  • Force feed yourself skills you don’t like but need

To leave you, I’ve compiled some questions from different sites to end 2015 and help you reflect on it as well. Answer these and leave them in the comment section below. (Don’t remove the tags in your comment – it’ll be visually easier this way to separate the question from you answer. I’ll leave an example as first comment.)

  1. <strong>How many memorable days from 2015 do you remember? (if it’s lower than 15 – you should add more variety) </strong>
  2. <strong>Planned or unplanned, what was the biggest obstacle you overcame in 2015?</strong>
  3. <strong>What’s One totally unexpected thing that happened that made your day better?</strong>
  4. <strong>What were the goals you successfully completed?</strong>
  5. <strong>What were the goals you failed? Why?</strong>
  6. <strong>What was the most memorable period/day of 2015?</strong>
  7. <strong>What was the saddest day/period of 2015?</strong>
  8. <strong>What was the funniest thing that happened in 2015?</strong>
  9. <strong>Looking back, what would you have done differently in 2015?</strong>
  10. <strong>What are you most proud of in the last year?</strong>
  11. <strong>What were the best books you read this year? How did they improve your life?</strong>
  12. <strong>What was your single biggest time waster in your life this past year?</strong>
  13. <strong>What was biggest LESSON you learned this past year?</strong>
  14. <strong>Create a phrase or statement that describes this past year for you.</strong>
  15. <strong>What did I learn? (skills, knowledge, awareness, etc.)</strong>
  16. <strong>What do I regret?</strong>
  17. <strong>What were my biggest challenges/roadblocks/difficulties?</strong>
  18. <strong>What new habits did you cultivate?</strong>
  19. <strong>What advice would you give your early-2015 self if you could?</strong>

</2015>
<2016>

if (you = ready){
kickAss();
};

——————————————————————————–

Thanks for reading this post and sticking with me till the end. Let’s make the best out of 2016 shall we?

Take care & stay strong

-Simon

Tags : 2015goal review

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15 Comments

  1. Thanks for the questions!
    Here are my answers briefly going through it. I also need to make my own review for things.
    How many memorable days from 2015 do you remember? (if it’s lower than 15 – you should add more variety) National conference DC, fiance 5, speech 1, crash 2, celebration 1, atlanta 3, other new people I met and places I explored… all in all 20-35 days or memories within a day that were really awesome and new and enjoyable. Most had to do with traveling and deep bonding with people. The time was mostly spent in front of a PC.
    Planned or unplanned, what was the biggest obstacle you overcame in 2015? Emotional depression when life crashed, starting over confidently again.
    What’s One totally unexpected thing that happened that made your day better? The people that stick to you regardless of what weaknesses or mistakes you have, those people that still believe in you and actually care about you.
    What were the goals you successfully completed? Got a job. Successfully had a clear month of fasting. Cleared myself emotionally.
    What were the goals you failed? Why? Too many. Spiritually and financially and social impact and contribution goals mainly.
    What was the most memorable period/day of 2015? When I was in love with a girl that I thought I would marry.
    What was the saddest day/period of 2015? A personal life crash event and then girl breakup phase.
    What was the funniest thing that happened in 2015? Um. Not sure but have funny people around lol.
    Looking back, what would you have done differently in 2015? Not taken that job, not been so blind with the girl, gone slower, and day by day incrementally increased business and spiritual progress. And learnt programming.
    What are you most proud of in the last year? Nothing really.
    What were the best books you read this year? How did they improve your life? Elon Musk biography. Or signs of the horizon for islamic spiritual saints showing what’s possible when you taste illuminations from the other realm, crazy such people still exist.
    What was your single biggest time waster in your life this past year? The computer and chasing women.
    What was biggest LESSON you learned this past year? Go slow, be thorough, you are not ready to change the world, just simply change yourself, the time is to be a student not a teacher. Give yourself time and years to nurture greatness.
    Create a phrase or statement that describes this past year for you. Squeeze to restart double as strong.
    What did I learn? (skills, knowledge, awareness, etc.) More spiritual depth. More tech involvement. Less people the better.
    What do I regret? Believing some of my delusions- being to idealistic chasing something when indeed I should have been clear in what I was really seeking- a lasting fulfillment not a fading pastime.
    What were my biggest challenges/roadblocks/difficulties? When someone doesn’t love you as much as you do and isn’t clear-headed about you, being an employee (I hate it like mark cuban does), and yeah getting deceived and duped easily both by my ego and desires as well as people and the world to cause alot of life wasting and ruin.
    What new habits did you cultivate? Hm. Not enough good ones!
    What advice would you give your early-2015 self if you could? Go slower, be thorough, stop trying to be so great, just be simple and deep and a solid human being, mentally, spiritually, physically, socially, financially. Give yourself time and don’t try to tackle everything so fast all at once- you may crash and die and burn your life and all your potential away. A horse can’t go 200mph even if you feed it the best grass, until you upgrade to the ferrari and got the training to drive a car don’t expect you can go that fast just off the bat, that’s a recipe for disaster. Know yourself, grow with how you learn and minimize your weaknesses by assuming you’re own weakness and nurturing yourself that way.

    – Let’s make the best out of 2016 shall we? YESSS!

  2. Hey bro,

    The super long reviewer and friend from across the ocean- I’m back!

    Hope you heal fast from your back injury, be sure to not strain it too much as you’re recovering! I admire your great physique and health alot and pray you stay strong and stay that way. Paleo diet, interesting. Body looking sooolidd! Impressive.

    Great progress on web development and on the women department, totally didn’t expect you to have so much growth.

    – I’ve learned HTML, CSS, JavaScript (+Jquery), Ruby, Rails and some basics on SQL (database) & Rspec (testing language). (+ you built 6 web apps in 6 months, all awesome.)
    – I’ve had 84 approaches, dozens of deep conversations (didn’t track but I guess at least 9 conversations which lasted more than 30 minutes) , 4 dates, 3 girls kissed and 0.5 sex (hand-jobs don’t count as sex). (haha you’re funny.)
    – Website: +-4000 weekly unique visitors/650+ subscribers so far. I’ve gotten about 130k visitors this year and a quarter of a million views and 500 downloads for your book. (Great numbers.)

    Feedback:
    – Health: no comment you are a beast and yeah I hope I can have a body and focus that solid within this year, will take effort. (Ever thought of coaching on that element?)
    – I think you are worth way more than car-washing, I hope you can lift a business up soon and show your star-hood, otherwise I need to hire you soon so you’re talent is better used haha. You are AMAZING at data analytics, have you ever considered SEO and marketing anlaysis and the like? You could read a few books and start a website and test with a few clients start your own digital marketing agency, I think you’d be great. (I’d love to work with you if interested).
    – Women wise I think beyond a high number of approaches and just having the experience of sex like with a random girl or prostitute, I think you need to focus on how you can increase number of dates (4 this year) and how deep you can take those dates into a deeper relationship and circle of friendship.
    – Book-wise… Programming: Hartl is good start for rails along with devtips rails apps, headfirst JS by freeman is good, etc. Business: Try personal mba by kaufman and blue ocean strategy for idea refining. If you combine this skills, something I too am working on, you can stumble on a niche and even work on building it yourself in a way that you never thought possible 😃

    “Think of the future as branching probability streams. What’s the most probable actions that will get you the result you’re looking for.”
    ^- Could you expound on this? Maybe worthy of a separate article for your life categories 😃

    Summary of your points: Be innovative. Passion is important, grind is double important. You must fight for things of value. Stay on the path, go through the process. One day at a time, just focus on giving it your best and being your best self today, and as you keep doing that each day your success shall keep adding up.

    1. heal fast from your back injury, be sure to not strain it too much as you’re recovering!

      I’ve made great improvements the last couple of weeks – I’m not going to dare saying it’s completely over but I’m closer each day

      Great progress on web development and on the women department, totally didn’t expect you to have so much growth.
      Thanks !

      Ever thought of coaching on that element?

      That’s exactly what I’m doing for my schoolwork and I’ve made some training programs for that. But there’s no real money in it. The people who are willing to pay +-60/hour for a personal trainer are mostly only women who solely need the motivation to lose some weight. I can send you a PDF I’ve created a while back on training & nutrition?

      I think you are worth way more than car-washing, I hope you can lift a business up soon and show your star-hood. You are AMAZING at data analytics, have you ever considered SEO and marketing analysis and the like? You could read a few books and start a website and test with a few clients start your own digital marketing agency, I think you’d be great. (I’d love to work with you if interested).

      Thanks for that too, that’s really appreciated. I hope the same. I’ve definitely thought about the direction where my skills would be best applied, something analytical is definitely high up there. Programming is my best guess atm. Currently would just like to have more time (eg end school) so I can try some things out.
      Here’s possible career options I’ve weighed;

      , I think you need to focus on how you can increase number of dates (4 this year) and how deep you can take those dates into a deeper relationship and circle of friendship.

      If my focus would be in that area, I’d primarily would focus on the amount and not the quality of positive experiences. I still have some emotional baggages from my youth I need to break.

      “Think of the future as branching probability streams. What’s the most probable actions that will get you the result you’re looking for.”

      It’s not that complicated, it’s just a fancy way of saying that when you make a new decision you should look for the most probably path that’ll get you where you want to be based on the available information.

      The same is true for predicting trends; what’s the most likely thing that’ll happen.
      It’s never a black or white, everything has a probability of happening.

      Some are just incredibly small (you getting rich by playing the lottery) vs learning a skill and starting a business based on it.

      Summary of your points: Be innovative. Passion is important, grind is double important. You must fight for things of value. Stay on the path, go through the process. One day at a time, just focus on giving it your best and being your best self today, and as you keep doing that each day your success shall keep adding up.

      That’s kind of it yeah. But, like I said in the article;

      I don’t believe in passion. As a matter of fact, I’ll probably roll my eyes at you when you use the word in conversation with me. (among others; empower, purpose, inspire, passion, “the universe” & manifest)

      I believe in hard work (eg so good they can’t ignore by Cal Newport)

  3. Yo Simon, cool stuff!

    Two things:

    1) That quote is so true haha: “You’ll get everything you want out of life, if you can stay focused – it’ll just take longer than you expected.” – 2015

    2) Holosync is annoying indeed. I have found it almost impossible to meditate properly because of the sound it makes. I’m wondering if one hour of regular meditation practice wouldn’t beat 1hr of holosync meditation.

    Anyway, keep up the good work!

    Cheers,
    Nils

  4. Man, i have to keep saying, you are one of my biggest mentors at the moment. We have so much almost the same journey, you are like 1-2 Years Advanced in almost everything, which is awesome because i can adjust and correct the errors, etc. Almost everytime i am going to do something i think “Wait! Simon did the same WTFFF!” which is fucking insane to be honest. Haha…with Holosync today i am going to drop it since i also didn’t notice that much effect for 60 days, (even i jumped to the “intermediate” Awakening Levels to see i could get a “punch in the face” of the progress “out of this world AKA enlightened) but didn’t work, and “wasting” an hour of the day and at the same time using it as an excuse to nod out (take a nap while listen to it) is waste opportunities LOL. At least increased my energy from the naps.

    Instead i am going back to my source of meditation: Listening to Practicing the Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle after waking up, which personally i found to get better at mindfulness, overcoming resistance and being in the now, which i lost during the experiment of Holosync since i substituted it for Meditation. I found myself getting kind of negative, irritating and judgmental.

    Whatever…

    If we would be friends i can really guarantee that we would be best friends. Are you my brother or something? is really insane. It really helps me your blogs and THE DEPTHS of it, it is extremely valuable, REALLY. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing your blogs…it takes BALLS to share yourself fully. Thank you very much Simon, Keep doing what you are doing.

    1. Hey Seba,

      Haha thanks :)

      That’s the whole point of reading blogs and books; so we don’t have to learn from our own mistakes but so we can just learn from the ones made by others.

      Yeah, holosync was a big dissapointment – I’m still waiting for the refund but am doubtful it’ll arrive. I now just drink tea whilst listening to this; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SZhVXmnXtU. It helps to clear my mind and focus more on the present. I liked Tolles’ book too.

      BFF ♥

      Keep rocking!

  5. Nice article dude!Does html work? Seems like you have really been progressing in many areas of your life! So you can code ruby on rails? Still have to learn that language… In terms of coding, you should really consider learning PHP. It’s probably one of (or) the most useful webscripting language to use. It’s an easy language.
    Some books I recommend you to read:
    Rework – Jason Fried (Recommended read by Mark Cuban)
    The Thank You Economy – Gary Vaynerchuk (Read this and you’ll have an advantage in marketing to most companies) (It’s next generation marketing)

    Ff een vraagje tussendoor: Ben jij Nederlands/Belgisch?

    A recap of my own progress:
    – I’m able to code in HTML, CSS, JS, JQUERY, AJAX, PHP, SQL (and a little in Java, Python and Angular.js)
    – I had my first real makeout this year (yeah, you may laugh now… I’m 18)
    – I have been noticing a shit load of stares from (hot!!) girls lately
    – I’m now one of the popular kids at (1st year) college, then again, I’m studying IT, most of them are nerds…
    – Reading business/biographies/self help books is now something I’m really into.
    – My website is almost done. I have created an niche related audience on tumblr, and have more than 3000 followers atm. (still gaining 800/month and rising)
    – I’ve been focusing more on fasion, and have grown into the clothes I used to be not very comfortable in.
    – Half of my friends are the biggest nerds ever. I still try to be friends with them, but I feel like they’re getting jealous/having successbariers.

    Hope you have a great year,
    Jasper

    1. Hey Jasper,

      Progress is nice :) I’ve been thinking about learning PHP as it’s the most used back-end language from what I’ve noticed. But so far I’ve been learning ruby on rails and want to stay focused on it & get better at it.

      I’m mostly looking for ways to improve my programming skills and social skills. I mostly don’t read recommendations as I’m only reading books as solutions to current life-problems I want solved.

      – Envious of programming repertoire :) – nice work!
      – I’d never laugh with something like that, I don’t consider myself good with women/people and have struggled with that also. But practicing it regularly and intently will ensure a time in the future where you’ll have the results you’re looking for.
      – nerds are cool people. Being one is ok. There are girls who are really compatible with the nerd-personality. It’s just that nerds have more difficulty making emotional connections or communicating their personality well.
      – If you feel friends are getting envious (and you care about the frienship), you should talk about it with them imo. not doing this leads to silent resentment and degrading of the relationship.

      I hope you kick ass at life next year!

      Sorry it took so long for your comment to come through – for some weird reason it was stuck in the spam-filter. (which I don’t check regularly)

      Belgisch :)

  6. Hey Simon!!! missed your posts bro! useful as always.

    Loved to read about your progamming skills, I am also trying to get into programming and I am finding it quite difficult.How long does the pain period take?
    How did you reason the opportunity cost in time?

    By the way I recently read a great book, the one thing,I think you should check it out if you havent already

    Best!! and keep up the great work

    1. Heyhey Alvaro,

      Yeah – I know. I’d love to write/video more but priorities are priorities though :)

      For me, it took about 6 months to get through the pain period (getting your skills to a decent level). It should be difficult though, it means less people will be able to do what you’re able to do and in turn you’ll have less competition.

      Opportunity cost: “the loss of other alternatives when one alternative is chosen.”

      Here’s my reasoning: I don’t know if it’s the right decision, I’ll never fucking know. But what’s worse is NOT DECIDING. It drains and kills you and the longer you wait the more difficult and doubtful you’ll become. Once day you just gather all the knowledge you have and make the best educated guess for the future.

      Based on everything I’ve seen and know – this is what I should be doing. And I’m sticking to it. That’s – in the end – all we can really do.

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