“Our brain are battlefields between our nature and our nurture.”
Life = struggle.
Life was never meant to be happy, life was meant to be effective.
We live in a lovy-dovy fairy-tale world where we try to twist our animalistic nature with sugar-coated social narratives.
Sorry to be so dramatic – but it’s quite true.
- “Every boy can find the right girl”
- “Sugar isn’t bad in moderation”
- “Marriage can work easily if there’s just enough love”
- “Follow your passion and everything will fall into place”
It doesn’t really work out that way, you know.
Accept for.. fairy tales maybe..
The world is controlled by natural laws, not cultural make-belief; gravity, evolution, climate change, aging, sexual selection and also; instinct. These are unavoidable no matter how hard you try.
And we’ve tried.. – believe me.
In our society the evolutionary agenda always seems to peek trough the surface layer of the social narrative we’re given – conflict soon followed.
For every drift we’ve made from our “natural way of living” we’ve suffered its respective consequences;
- Over-consumption of trans-fats and sugar (mainly) leading to obesity, diabetes, heart-disease, … . Overindulged nature leads to self-destruction
- Suppression of sexual instinct by cultural “morals” corrupt our behavior leading to stoning (in Arabic culture), mutilation of genitals, child abuse in the catholic church, porn addictions, … . Suppressed nature manifests itself in darker ways.
- Advent of agriculture made private property possible and we shifted from a egalitarian society to a more capitalistic one.
What parts of culture are actually against human nature and how can we return to our origin? And more importantly; how can we thrive in this world and make ourselves future proof?
You are still an animal – stop pretending you’re not.
The Origin Of All Problems
“Man can do what he wills but he cannot will what he wills” – Arthur Shopenhauer
The way we are is the result of evolution; ALL the things we want have been planted in our DNA. Whether we like it or not. It’s there for a damn good reason.
Although we can choose what we want to do with our time – our options are limited to fulfilling our basic needs.
And what does every human want?
Survival & procreation.
Access to sex and resources is what everyone is after. It’s what drives most of our behavior and is of primary importance.
Not happiness, not passion, not meaning, not education, not love …
Sex & money
It’s only until these needs become suppressed or overindulged that we get a real problem.
How are we doing?
By becoming the most dominant species on this planet years ago we’ve practically guaranteed indefinite survival. At least in the more developed countries it’s like this.
- You don’t have to go out hunting for your food daily
- You don’t have to sleep on the streets anymore
- Sex is something different – although we’ve found other ways to satisfy those needs (masturbation to free porn mainly)
Life purpose completed, right?
Our instincts no longer have a clue what we’re supposed to do and therefore we’re just making up our own direction by filling up our time and finding our own meaning.
Most can’t handle this and fall into a black hole without direction. A situation Viktor Frankl coined “The Existential Depression“.
The main cause for this existential depression is that we’re going trough the fastest period of
progression growth in human history ever.
Technology is going crazy, population is expanding at an enormous rate whilst fossil fuels can barely keep up our throwaway society.
Times are changing fast.
The main cause?
The start of agriculture
Since the agricultural revolution has arisen we’ve shifted from a egalitarian system of culturally imposed sharing to one of private property.
Land could now be possessed, owned, and passed down the generations. Food that had been hunted and gathered now had to be sowed, tended, harvested, stored, defended, bought, and sold. Fences, walls, and irrigation systems had to be built and reinforced; armies to defend it all had to be raised, fed, and controlled. Because of private property, for the first time in the history of our species, paternity became a crucial concern
With agriculture, virtually everything changed: the nature of status and power, social and family structures, how humans interacted with the natural world, the gods they worshiped, the likelihood and nature of warfare between groups, quality of life, longevity and the rules governing sexuality – Christopher Ryan & Cacilda Jetha
The term “prehistoric communism” definitely applies.
Life became a struggle for resources & sex.
A struggle for the right to procreate and survive. As our population density grows and resources grow scarcer the world gets more competitive by the day.
In small groups egalitarianism is the best way to reduce risk by equally distributing resources and building strong social bonds.
Yet – in larger groups selfishness is harder to control and leads to a “free-rider”-effect
Meaning they take resources from the communal pile – but don’t provide any back.
“What allows these chain-linked tragedies is the absence of local, personal shame. We ignore the fine-grain contours of life in small-scale communities where nobody “could have escaped public scrutiny and judgment,” in Rousseau’s words.
These tragedies become inevitable only when the group size exceeds our species’ capacity for keeping track of one another, a point that’s come to be known as Dunbar’s number“
We become more selfish/corrupted as group-size increases and resources get scarcer as there aren’t social consequences for free-riding.
With rising competition we’ve tried our best to use, suppress, indulge and control these needs throughout history – leading to all kinds of modern problems.
Human desire is not to be suppressed nor indulged but controlled
We’ve suffered consequences that can be seen in all areas of our life.
Relationships shifted from an egalitarian perspective where sex was mutually shared (Bonobo model) to one of private property. Women shifted from a high-status role in the tribe to another “possession” for the man to own besides his livestock and lands.
Unequal access to resources lead to a reproductive trade-off. The unspoken contract of status & wealth provided by the men for sexual fidelity by the women arose.
Power-struggles, income inequality and confused gender roles galore
The “paradox” of traditional gender roles is, in this sense, a product of the opposition between what our genes and past culture dispose us to do and what our present culture now prescribes.
The same traditional gender roles that facilitate men’s and
women’s attraction to each other may also, in the context of egalitarian social ideals, impede their ability to communicate and lead to dissatisfaction in their relationships. – William Ickes
Additionally; monogamy started to become the cultural norm – imposed by religion.
Religious extremism infected behavior to control our sexual instincts throughout history- resulting (still up to this day) in divorce, mutilation, oppression, child abuse, corruption, adultery and whatnot.
“About 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce. The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher.” – American Psychological Association
Not to say how many couples stay together for financial security, children, convenience and whatnot. How many are actually “happy”?
- You just need enough “love”?
Against our nature is what I’d say.
Here’s another mess;
With agriculture came more carbohydrates; wheat, cane, squash & mainly sugar.
Probably the worst thing you can eat these days. Especially in the form of high fructose corn syrop.
Yes – It’s a cost-effective way to feed a lot of people but humans were not designed for such a diet. Our bodies can’t operate on such abundance of carbs.
Multinationals (who stopped caring about your health a looooong time ago) play into your natural desire for high-fat and high-sugary foods. So they manufacture and modify the desired ingredients to get the most dopamine-inducing foods possible.
Irresistible treats for our biological nature – addictive to a great extent.
Which destroys your brain and makes other, healthier foods taste like cardboard.
And off course;
“Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?”
Private property meant we now had resources to protect. Off-course you couldn’t keep everything to yourself (environment, theft, decay, …) and therefore we made houses where our resources were “safely” kept in the form of money.
Leading to a concentration of power without real social control/scrutiny in large groups.
What did I say about overindulged nature again?
I can’t really criticize the world without providing an alternative – can I?
Yes I can – But I’ll try anyway;
I believe a more capitalistic system is necessary as population has simply grown too large. Greater groups leads to an uncontrolled “free-rider” effect where people take resources at the expense of others – leading to an immoral downward spiral of power struggles.
Here’s some more questions that need answering;
- Are there enough resources for everyone? I don’t know
- Can we get more social control to monitor free-riding? Maybe
- Do we need global population control & resource management? Definitely
Now, for the best part; How can you – considering these trends – make yourself future proof ?
Difficulty Level: Simple
- Gradually switch to paleo-diet/ketogenic diet. Here’s what you can eat
- Do some weight-training 3/4 times per week
Difficulty Level: Might Hurt/Be Uncomfortable
- Become a more confident, high-status man trough self-development
- Look your best & have a sorted out lifestyle (money, hobbies, friends, ..)
- Get better social skills (Read; How To Win Friends And Influence People by Dale Carnegie)
- Make small circles of reciprocal kindness with close friends (practice egalitarianism in your own “select group”
- Don’t get married, ever– lifelong monogamy is against human nature and will come back later to bite you in the ass. Coolidge-effect
- Read “Models” by Mark Manson – Seriously. Best book on dating EVER
- Don’t watch porn – it screws up your brain. Use the building arousal to “hunt” for real women. Approach.
- Masturbation (dry orgasms preferably) and prostitution are still better than porn.
Note; I’m wondering what indefinite access to sex would do for our society in regards to conflict, rape, theft, adultery, violence & murder. I’d think we’d be a lot more relaxed if people weren’t so sexually deprived.
Difficulty Level: Dragging-your-balls-trough-a-desert-of-broken-glass-difficult
This might be the trickiest part.. . But from what I’ve learned so far, this is my best guess;
Being able to do what others cannot is what makes you valuable.
Anyone can sell shoes, anyone can run behind a dumpster truck, anyone can sell fast-food. But not everyone knows how to build a house, lay electrical wiring or perform an open-heart-surgery.
The more difficult and in-demand your skills are – the higher your pay-grade will rise.
For illustrative purposes I’ve made this fancy info-graphic;
This means that the barrier of entry for competitors will be high (less competition) and you work in a field where your skills are highly valued.
- Learn difficult, high-in demand skills
- Additionally, building on strength gives you an “edge” on others.
- Combine these in an entrepreneurial venture. (Everyone will need to be an entrepreneur soon)
The world isn’t always sunshine and rainbows like our culture wants to make you believe.
Although humans are by nature altruistic, the world is getting more and more competitive. Overpopulation caused by agriculture makes humanity go head-forth towards an Malthusian catastrophe.
Don’t be the sucker who’s getting ill-treated because he’s unaware of the disguised interests of people around you. No human can completely resist their nature for sex and resources.
It doesn’t mean you have to become distrustful towards everybody just know to stay alert when it comes to money, relationships and health. Not everyone has your best interests at heart.
Life has become a competitive game – learn to play it to your best abilities.
So make good long-term choices in each area.
Passion is spewed around as being the holy grail of life (especially in self development circles) meaning we”ll slide across the rainbow happily ever after. But the point is simply this: If you aren’t highly skilled at a in-demand task there’s chances you won’t EVER be able to make a lot of money from it.
Marriage is supposed to be effortless and the “ideal” model for love – yet it goes against your polygamous nature. Lifelong monogamy is a culturally imposed hoax.
Carb are bad – Eat more fats.
Thanks for reading my post and congrats on getting this far! If you have any more thoughts or questions on this post feel free to leave them in the comment section below.
Take care & Stay Strong
PS: This post might be a bit controversial – keep feedback constructive ;)
PPS: Cool quora discussion